Dare I ask where Gay is hiding in this picture?

Dave Groves, to me this is the most telling and convincing portrayal of the blunt truth of what goes on behind closed doors.
Take note of the expression on the face of Willy, it’s as if, oops, I’m sprung sitting in the tub with the supposed enemy of the Liberals!
Then too, the the other bozo’s sitting and grinning like rats possessed with a gold tooth!
Perhaps this could be another form of a Labor cabinet meeting, Sturgo having just nipped out to the taxpayer-funded fridge for another round of drinks, whilst Lara of course, has trotted off to the ladies loo.
As for the State’s Big Wheel, the Chairman of the Board, he had jumped out earlier and quickly went a huntin’ for the State Treasury cheque-book.

Tassies Democratic System in Flagrant Delecto.

A classic show of the Tasmanian government

The Godmother

Rupert looked over the bridge. The murky waters, far below could just be made out in the dim light of the thin moon. The last pub had closed an hour ago and now it was time. He had tried, unsuccessfully, to drown his sorrows, but life held nothing more for him. All those years wasted. A quick drop, a few minutes of cold and then nothing. They would find his body washed up on some remote shore miles down the river. The note he had left would be found later, telling the unappreciative world what he thought of it and giving his reasons for departing therefrom. Wearily, and slightly wobbly from the drink, he climbed the parapet, and stood there, swaying and hesitating, steeling himself for that final plunge.
“Young man, what do you think you’re doing?”
He looked down from his precarious perch on the edge. “I committing suicide, what do you think?”
The old crone, dressed in outlandish clothing down to her ankles peered back at him. “Stop being foolish,” she croaked. “There are no problems I can’t solve if you want some help. Now just climb down from there and let’s act sensibly, shall we?”
“How can an old woman like you help someone like me. It’s not possible. Goodbye,” and he made as though he were about to jump.
“Go on then, jump. If you don’t want to listen to advice, then so be it. You’ll only have a few minutes to be sorry about it, but if that is what you want, then goodbye.”
Some call it obstinacy, others perversity, yet others, sheer cussedness, but there is nothing like being told to do what you intended to do anyway, to make you want to change your mind.
Climbing slowly down, Rupert turned to the old lady and said, “O.K. Tell me about it. It had better be good, otherwise I’m back up on top there, and it’s curtains.”
“I’m glad you’ve decided to be sensible. You see, I was sent here for a purpose. I knew what you were about to do, and I’ve been asked to save you. Life has still got a lot in store.”
Rupert looked at her quizzically.
“You see,” she continued, “I’m really your Fairy Godmother.”
He was still somewhat befuddled by the drink, but this was unreal. “Fairy Godmother?”
“That’s right young man. Why else do you think an old Dame like me would be out walking along a bridge like this after midnight if I hadn’t been sent here? Now, what are you’re problems young man? I can only grant you three wishes, so think carefully.”
‘It’s weird, but what the hell, what have I got to lose?’ he thought to himself. ‘Here goes.’
“I’m a stock broker, and as you must know, the stock market has just crashed. I saw it coming and I hedged my bets, or so I thought, and I invested my entire portfolio in bank shares. I swear, nobody could see that one coming. The bank itself went bankrupt! I’m totally ruined. I’ve lost my house, my furniture, all my savings—everything. I’m now penniless.”
“Is that all? Simple. A wave of my wand and by tomorrow you will find the entire lot has resurrected itself and you will actually make an enormous profit. The bank will be bailed out and you will be ten times better off than you were before.”
“Really? I mean…?” But then another thought struck him. “That’s not all. A week ago I arrived home and I found my wife in bed with my partner. Now she has gone off with him and I am heartbroken.”
“Hearts are soon mended. In the next two days you will find the most gorgeous blonde. Incredible, with legs like Heaven and boobs like Paradise, and she will be all yours. She will make you forget you ever had a wife within a week. One wave, that’s all it takes.”
“And what about my car? My brand new Mercedes. Written off and with the insurance expired. I could never afford another.”
“Young man, you have little faith in my abilities. All it needs is another wave and the insurance company will make you an offer. The advertising company will pick you out to make an example of how good they are to their clients. They will replace your car for you, but there will be one small snag, like all things in life there is a small penalty. They will want to use your name in their advertising and you will have to tell everybody how good they have been to you.”
“That’s no problem. I don’t mind in the least. When will all this happen?”
“By tomorrow! But as I said, there is one small snag. Even Fairy Godmothers have to be paid a token. There is none of that Cinderella stuff in real life. There is a small fee for such great benefits.”
“What’s that?”
“Me. You have to satisfy me?”
“In what way?”
“Come, come. Don’t be so naive. The usual way, of course. There’s no such thing as a free lunch, you know, not even in my business.”
“Yes, but….
“There is a lovely little place under the end of the bridge”, she grinned, showing him her cracked and broken teeth.

cont…..

......cont.

“But, but….....”
“Is there something wrong. Don’t you want your three wishes? You prefer your watery grave?”
“Yes but…...”
“Then come. Let’s have no more nonsense,” and she led him hesitantly to the end of the bridge.
Grazilda, for that was her name, was not shy. No sooner were they out of sight than she stripped off down to her naturals. Even by the dim light, Rupert was having nightmares. Her boobs were closer to her knees than to Paradise and her legs looked more like dragging him to Hell than taking him to Heaven. She was ghastly, and he wasn’t sure that a ‘Last Supper’ wouldn’t be a far better definition than a ‘Free Lunch’.
“The piper only demands a small fee,” she croaked. “After all, you get your reward for an entire lifetime. Come now, stop shilly-shallying and make it good!
‘Well, I suppose I don’t actually have anything to lose. I was about to end it all anyway. I’ll just have put a brave face on it and die for King and Country,’ he thought, and with a sigh he got down to business.

Nearly an hour later, Grazilda professed herself satisfied. “A fine performance young man. Best I’ve had for at least a week.”
“A Week? What do you mean, a week?” asked Rupert.
“Oh, it happens all the time. I walk along this bridge every night and there is always someone in need of help.”
“Oh,” he said, “Do you grant them all three wishes?”
There was a longish silence while she looked him up and down.
“Young man,” she said, pulling on the last of her clothes, “Just how old are you?”
“I’ll be thirty seven in a few days.”
“Thirty seven?” she mused. “Ummmm. Remarkable! Thirty seven, and you still believe in Fairy Godmothers!”
—————————————————————

Gerry Mander will be away for the next couple of week.